A Pity Party for me

You know looking back on a few things I realized my little brother has been blaming himself for a lot of things that are totally my fault. For instance, my ex and her raining wrath on me and making me sick wasn’t his fault in any way but mine. Earlier, I should have seen her cheating ways and recognized what she was doing and accepted it, thereby dumping her instead of clinging on to her like some crazy fool. If I had, then Jacks wouldn’t have run into her with her “dates” and felt the need to tell me. Hence she couldn’t blame him for telling me the truth. I wouldn’t have gotten the crap beat out of me and dehydrated and then sick making him sit with me at the hospital worrying him for that long while as I still do with an infection that won’t leave because I’m too stubborn to control it. Ok, that’s settled now part 2: his old girlfriend liked me at first; we all know that -- he does too. That New Years Night if I had just gave into her silly immature ways and set her straight how to act; she would have gone on her way thus saving him from one of his greatest heartaches. Later, she wouldn’t have left him like she did; she would have been angry with me and gone on her way to do damage to another. Part 3: My Pops, that huge jerk needs to take his aggressions out on me, jacks is totally innocent, my Pop has a beef with me and my decisions in life. Jacks however sticks up for me and also receives the brunt of it. My Pops is right I’m not the brightest bulb in the box; I can’t even read a phone bill correctly. Today I totally fluffed office work here and there; I can’t seem to maintain any kind of concentration when it comes to paper work. Who does that? Who starts a business and can’t do the paper work? I do! I really need to get back into the game; I’ve been slacking on jobs and work ethics and keeping up paperwork. So now, no more whining and moping, I’m going to take charge again, with work and home and anything else pertaining to my life. No more letting things slip by, any more of forgotten things, no more half ass work. Let’s see if there is going to be improvements.