Where does the time go?

So yesterday was a flurry of busy for me. The night before was no less, I spent the majority of it with Jacks trying to understand him and his emotions and explaining the theory of a crazy woman. Why she enjoys toying with him as much as possible gets her off. After all that I jumped up around 4:30 am ran to work and then half of a class then raced back to work to spend the rest of the day with the City. We planned on the next seasons projects: cost; time; equipment; size on and on. I was bored and getting ill at this one guy that kept repeating things over and over. How many times can you have something explained to you? Around 7 pm we stopped the meeting and felt things were in order; scheduling another meeting in a few months. I was tired and wanted to go straight to bed but homework waited on me and my Mom had an attack that kept her from being with her sister during the day. Everyone was in an uproar over that because she’s been doing so well, she stays on top of me about not getting enough rest. Jacks was once again in a thither over the same person and I felt this time a little harsh words might need to be used -- I came through loud and clear this time. Lori just stood there and looked at me as if I were a fool. Finally some peace came when Amy called me and I relaxed for the night. Then next four or five days will be spent in the greenhouse putting that in order for the season. I think we have some pretty big plans going on there this year.

So the Oscars are boring to me,

TV actually is boring to me; I can’t seem to sit down long enough to pay attention. I worked hard this weekend ha! Not really, I partied every night just a bit too much on Friday night I might add. It was a friend’s birthday party and another was having a kid - not in the bar. So the celebration was on for me. My family is very important to me as I’m sure your family is to you. My sister, who is only seven, has a new boy friend -- her first. I think she likes to taunt us with talk about him; his eyes, how he laughs, the milk coming out of his nose occurrence. Jacks was in no mood to hear about it and just ignored the whole conversation. My older brother Luke called me today to chat it up some and wanted to know how things were progressing with my Pops. I guess same old same, my Pops is a dink. He’s controlling, has abusive vocabulary and a rude attitude towards us. He says the only reason he treats us like this is to make us “real men”. I say bull crap. My Mom is doing fairly well these days, even with her sister being ill with ovarian cancer. My ex dropped in today which brought me great joy, (not) she heard about my aunt and wanted to check in on everyone and to show us her belly. She’s seven months pregnant and she won’t say who the father is. -- Not mine. I was able to chat some with Amy today but not for long. This week, I’m afraid, is going to be very hectic for me. Planting season here we come.

Some women are real buggers

- I mean that in the English vernacular. Except of course my Amy, she’s perfect to me however, she does thank me frequently for “putting up with her moods”. I don’t know what moods she’s talking about but the thank you is a nice touch. I guess people on the internet don’t realize how some people perceive them in their actions. Sometimes a kind gesture or comment can easily be taken the wrong way. Unless you are versed in social situations or you have a full grasp of what is going on you can get pretty lost; my younger brother was home schooled, so he is at a disadvantage when it comes to those settings. Right now he has a 37 year old lady foaming at the mouth over him because he’s sweet and innocent and will do anything to please her – not like that. He has a good disposition about people and likes to listen to their problems and pays as much attention to as possible. Always on the ready to help them out – a pure sign of a sucker, however nice he is, and this person has made advances and comments that would make construction workers blush. He’s laughed them off and ignored her for a while now but it appears to be getting on his nerves somewhat, so the other night he had a sit down talk with her. I’m proud that an eighteen year old would actually want to do that, he could have easily played with her emotions and tossed her aside. So he had the sit down with her and wonders why she blows him off, when she sees him – hence the bugger comment. She admitted to him that he was a challenge and “always likes a challenge” still; he doesn’t understand what she meant by that and how someone could feel that way and be happy in life. I tried to explain to him soon as she got what she wanted, she would go off to the next victim leaving him wondering what just happened. Right now he sits and wonders if he said the wrong thing or hurt her in some way, worried that he is the bad guy………..

Just a thought in passing

When life becomes unbearable sometimes just letting go is the only and best result. I’m not talking about jumping off a cliff or driving into a brick wall because you aren’t getting your way or unhappy how your life is going. I mean like my aunt, who now is in constant pain, who can’t sit up with out being sick; she can’t drink, eat or sleep with out being in agony. She’s swollen from retaining water, they remove liters and it returns. She can’t eat to keep her strength to endure the chemo. I remember the day that she was diagnosed with the cancer -- a year ago this month. My Mom had to beg and plead with her to have surgery and have the chemo. She did well after for months, just chiming along, (she’s a teacher for handicapped kids) then it came back once more this time in a big way. Tearing her down in spirit as well; the cancer cells spreading more in her body to her stomach and liver. Her focus on getting better is lost, she wants to give up and feel better to ease her pain. Stage 4 ovarian cancer is a bitch, a murderer of women every day; a break down of families. I can’t blame her for feeling this way and wanting the pain to stop. I worry for my own Mom and her health as well, sitting there night after night, holding her sisters hand, urging her to carry on -- to fight. I see the heartache in my grandparents’ eyes to witness the loss of another child.

Weekend News

My weekend was eventful but short, Saturday night I decided to visit Trace and see how his band is coming along. He informed me that someone from a small record label would like to do a demo track with him and he was quiet nervous over that. The whole group settled in and began planning our gambling trip of sorts; every four months or so a group of us travel to a small town in Mississippi and gamble the night away. Since it’s not a very long drive we spend one or two nights there spending our hard earned money into machines or some table game. I particularly like to play Black Jack, not really into the whole Poker scene. Sunday was of course Gs with pizza which didn’t agree with me very well. PG and I sat down and worked on his newest remote control helicopter and we or course chased the cows with it. Lori was all about her little boy friend at school and told us every detail about him during dinner. I was excited about Monday, my whole day to spend with Amy but that wasn’t to be this time. So we ended up spending the majority of Sunday night together laughing our heads off. Some of the things she does kills me into laughter and then a coughing fit. My Mom is doing well right now but spending a lot of time with her sister in the hospital which for some very odd reason angers my Pops. The last week he has actually been in a decent mood. Today will be a long work day for me, so many appointments to work out. The planting season is coming up for us…….. and happy semi anniversary Amy I love you.

So this weekend is an interesting one.

Amy and I are doing great, we manage to see one another at least once a day , if we didn’t my day wouldn’t be complete. My sister has her first crush, a boy in the class ahead of her. I told her that I must check him out soon as possible. She whimpered and insisted I don’t go to school because I will scare him away; my very reasoning. We will see. I'll go out tonight to listen to my favorite group, in my favorite pub and drink my favorite drink. Very interesting weekend indeed.

Valentine thoughts

So another Valentines has arrived, I’m still happy and in love with Amy. She’s my one true love, the one and only thing that pulled me out of a huge funk almost 3 years ago. For some reason when we met we just “Got” each other, call it animal magnetism, call it lust, call it she’s the hottest thing to walk on this planet I call it love, as the song goes I’m truly, madly, deeply in love with her. When I’m angry she calms me and soothes my soul, when I need some attention she’s the first in line to give it. She spoils me with her caring and comfort and reassuring words when I need them. I’m not a punk ass guy that needs some girl to hold my hand all the time, although I don’t mind it from her. Like I said she gets me, with her sexy little sighs on the phone to teasing me into frenzy, she’s everything and more that a man needs in life. Smart? Have I mentioned how smart she is? Put her on a job and she nails it down and blows the “professionals” away. She’s dedicated to every adventure she does, some times going about it haphazardly but the job is always complete. Anyway, I don’t know exactly how to go about saying how much I love her other than doing it in this fashion. I love you Amy.

Mondays Fun

Another day of fun for Amy and I, we chatted it up during my lunch time. That whole hour or so flies so fast; I wish the rest of the day would. I got a call in from the people we ordered our office furniture from; hopefully it comes in on Thursday. Later that night I had a nice quiet dinner with Mom and Pops, what a change that is to be actually eating with them. Mom is still worried about her older sister and how she is adapting to the chemo since yesterday was her first treatment. My Pops has his job on his mind most of dinner, he kept calculating figures out here and there and you could tell he was in a pickle on some design. Lori and I did homework and played a game of cards, she’s into cards now? Black Jack in fact, I swear she’s hanging out with the mafia with her Butt Crack Flame Tattoos and now gambling. Jacks kept to himself in his room, Mom attempted to talk to him some but he was inconsolable. I know exactly how he feels “Just don’t baby me ok?” that’s the only reply I get out of him. Lori insisted he show her a card trick and spend some time with her. Little sisters that love their older brothers can charm any worry or depression out of them. She did it too; he was in a semi good mood after she left his room. I’m ready for work today and then some rest tonight, some odd reason I’m super sleepy in the evenings “Evil grins”.

The Story Begins.......here

So, the story begins here..... If you are wondering about my history read some of my blogs; try this link http://www.xanga.com/Marks_Blah_Blog It has over two years of posts on there. Actually no, don't go there, I’ve put everything on Private because the old posters and readers of my Blog kept checking in to see if I was going to write there again. So I semi closed it, my last post was a simple line "so the story ends here". It doesn't have the daily links that I want on a web page like this site does. Also I couldn't post how I felt and really wanted to say because of the backlash my popular brother would receive from them, so for now I will call this home. I have to say goodbye to all the Xanga readers that "sneaked" to visit my page and I could go on for hours with the countless clones they used. I don't have to say goodbye to my one true love, Amy. Get ready folks its going to be a bumpy ride. If you are going to read this on a regular basis. I expect a comment or two just to see where I'm going and put me in my place. That’s one thing that never happened on the Xanga site, no one ever commented, they read and re-read my posts but never commented.