Oh hamburger!

Early yesterday afternoon my Mom calls me all frantic “Your brother, the Master Chef has done it again” I had no inkling what she was babbling on about. Then she told me the school called and Jacks was in the hospital for food poisoning and may need his stomach pumped. Oh gravy, can he possibly just sit still a day or two and not get into any more scrapes?
I promised to watch Lori at her softball practice last night so off and on I tried calling him to see how he was feeling. Lori loves her team and going into the batting cages, this surprises me because she is such a priss and hates to get dirty. All the little girls piled up near first base to chatter and gossip, Lori has all the fun in playing first.
I gave Jacks a call later on last night as sort of a check up, he spoke to me in a weak sleepy voice, and you could clearly hear he was beat. “So, how about you and me grab a bite to eat?” I heard his gag reflexes go to work on him and he said a few, as Lori would put it “not nice” things to say.
He was making me laugh so hard but I kept it as a muffled snicker while on the phone. I would ask questions and in and out of his daze he would answer me. Some times with the oddest replies. “Jacks what exactly did you do buddy?” his reply would be “Well, Ed if the load bearing wall was moved approximately 6 inches….” Clearly he was out of it. I kept him on the phone a while longer, partly to sooth my mind he was ok and also to get a few more laughs.
This morning I gave him a call bright and early, same groggy voice. I asked him exactly what might he has done. “Hey! It wasn’t me! I bought the stupid hamburgers” did you see? HAMBURGERS --- plural. He ate the first one just fine, no problem but the 2nd one didn’t taste the same and had about 3 bites of it and stopped eating, almost immediately felt ill. Apparently him self and one other guy at the table had the same bout of problems. He said he was ok, just super tired and with a huge headache and never wanted another hamburger again in his life. Yeah right, he will be eating them by the end of the week. I asked if they pumped his stomach and he snarled no they didn’t need to it was working on that quiet well on its own.
I told him he sounded much better that he did last night. “We talked last night?” I explained it was super late and yeah we did have an amusing conversation. He could hardly remember coming home, one of the kids from his class, who stayed with him and the other guy the whole time got him settled.